This list has been done by many online music publications in the past, and for good reason. Noel Gallagher is a polarizing figure in rock and roll. Many praise his genius, and consider his contributions to the songbook of rock to be some of the greatest ever composed. A good amount of people also despise Noel, and consider him to be an overrated hack who has had little to no influence on the genre.
Here at To Be Rock Blog we love Noely G and his BIG MOUTH. Get it? That’s an Oasis joke. Hope you got that lol. Anyway, over the years Noel has said some pretty hilarious shit, and so we’ve decided to dedicate a post to our favorite things he’s said. This list is what we consider to be the definitive collection of Noel’s best quips. We hope you’ll enjoy it too… or fuck off.
On Oasis’s music videos: “I have to say about all these videos: If you needed four guys to walk around in slow motion, we were the best at that.”
On Liam: “Sure I love Liam, but not as much as I love pot noodles!”
On the Moon: “If I ever get to go to the moon, I’ll probably just stand on the Moon and go ‘Hmm… Fair enough… Gotta go home now.”
On music: “All I ever wanted to do was make a record. Here’s what you do: you pick up your guitar, you rip a few people’s tunes off, you swap them round a bit, get your brother in the band, punch his head in every now and again, and it sells. I’m a lucky bastard. I’m probably the single most lucky man in the world — apart from our Liam.”
On money: “Liam got a Rolex. I got a Rolls Royce. Which is brilliant, cos I can’t drive and Liam can’t tell the time.”
On Jack White: “Zorro on donuts.”
On Liam: “He’s rude, arrogant, intimidating and lazy. He’s the angriest man you’ll ever meet. He’s like a man with a fork in a world of soup.”
On King of Limbs: “I heard that fucking Radiohead record and I just go, ‘What?!’ I like to think that what we do, we do fucking well. Them writing a song about a fucking tree? Give me a fucking break! A thousand year old tree? Go fuck yourself! You’d have thought he’d have written a song about a modern tree or one that was planted last week. You know what I mean?”
On Pop Albums: “The music of let’s say Taylor Swift, Ed Sheeran, Rihanna, Beyoncé, fucking Christina Aguilera, all that pop stuff, you’re not meant to listen to 11 songs like that in a row on an album. Quite frankly, you’d commit suicide, wouldn’t you? You’re only supposed to listen to one song at a time in the car on the way to the fucking supermarket. I’m not sure anybody can sit through 50 minutes of that kind of music. Fucking hell. I’d have to take out the entire mall, wouldn’t you? I would.”
On Ecology & Conservation: “Talking about upping the antes, when we get to South America we’re actually gonna set fire to some bastard rain forests, as well man. Fucking trees. Always getting in the way of all them car parks!”